Yeah the festive mood is here!! It goin to be christmas in a few days time and New year soon too. I just completed my darling's christmas card. Its a pop up card I did it by myself and I'm proud of it.
New year is coming, a brand new year. I hope I will have a smooth sail ahead. That's all for today.

Sign off feeling happy

Yeah!!! My previous post mentioned about an interview. I got the job on the stop. Can you imagine? I was so excited that when I walk out of the company I ran to the open and take a puff. I am so happy for words now... thus I'm sharing a sad story with you guys.

"Take time to appreciate what you have now."



On the last day before Christmas, I hurried to go to the supermarket to buy the remaining of the gift I didn't manage to buy earlier.
When I saw all the people there, I started to complain to myself," It is going to take forever here and I still have so many other places to go.
Christmas really is getting more and more annoying every year. How I wish I could just lie down, go to sleep and only wake up after it..."



Nonetheless, I made my way to the toy section, and there I started to curse the prices, wondering if after all kids really play with such expensive toys.

While looking in the toy section, I noticed a small boy of about 5 years old, pressing a doll against his chest. He kept on touching the hair of the doll and looked so sad. I wondered who this doll was for. Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him, "Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?"

The old lady replied, "You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear."
Then she asked him to stay here for 5 minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I started to walk toward him and I asked him who he wanted to give this doll to.
"It is the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her, after all, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can not bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mother so that she can give it to her when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mummy will also go to see God very soon, so I thought that she could bring the doll with her to give it to my sister."

My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said, "I told daddy to tell mummy not to go yet. I asked him to wait until I come back from the supermarket."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me, "I also want mummy to take this photo with her so that she will not forget me." I love my mummy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."
Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.



I quickly reached for my wallet and took a few notes and said to the boy, "What if we checked again, just in case if you have enough money?"
"Ok," he said. "I hope that I have enough."



I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll, and even some spare money. The little boy said, "Thank you God for giving me enough money." Then he looked at me and added, "I asked yesterday before I slept for God to make sure I have enough money to buy this doll so that mummy can give it to my sister. He heard me." "I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mummy, but I didn't dare to ask God too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and the white rose." "You know, my mummy loves white rose."



A few minutes later, the old lady came again and I left with my trolley.



I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck who hit a car where there was one young lady and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to get out of the coma.



Was this the family of the little boy?



Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young lady had passed away. I couldn't stop myself and went to buy a bunch of white roses and I went to the mortuary where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wish before burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place crying, feeling that my life had been changed forever.

The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunken man had taken all this away from him.

this story bring touch of sadness to the lovely christmas that we have. To remind us the things we have around us and the word "appreciation".

Sign off with excitment

My blood is boiling now!!!! I have this crazy boss that scream at everyone everyday. I am nearly dying of craziness. Today he was so bloody free that he run through the stuff in my dustbin, next he scream at me for not shredding the paper. I was like "what the fuck!", I have a boss who has nothing to do. He took out the ciggy box which I threw away, and start scream that all these must be shred away. I told him that those where extra copies of the enquiry emails. I was thinking. Who the hack will be as free as you to dig the dustbin for our company's private info. And next our small tiny little company who will bother about us. If he as the bloody time, he should jolly well think of ways to earn money. *our company is making a huge loss. Next I ask you for petty cash money so that I can distribute to the rest of the workers. He scream at me again. Shit him he say the petty cash should claim for medical transport ETC. But u stupid foool!!! petty cash is for claims which are small amount less then 100. Then he says he wun pay for things that are bought for the machineries. then be it. he jolly well tell the workers about. none of my business. I really have enough of his rubbish. where got boss like him scream at everyone everyday like a routine. my account left because he can't stand him, my marketing coodinator left because she cant stand him. I will be leaving soon. and my sales person will also leave too. Lets see who will work for him, for such a person who is a pain in the neck. Whenever I ask him this, he will reply that. certain things that only take 5 min he takes 1 hours and say we waste his time. I can't help killing him. I nearly Fuck him back today. But luckly I didn't. Haha my manger will have a hard time if I f up. Because he would mag at her and tell her a whole lots of rubbish saying i was this and that. Anyway I'm goin for interview tommorrow if i get the job. i will say Sayonara to him.

sign off with anger

Did not update my blog for few days. Here are some of the updates. Got myself a new pair of colour contact lens and I look like a cat now. But I love it. Next I go and did my menicure. I simply love the new nail arts. I did for 10 fingers with the rose on top and 1 crystal on each finger will post the photo of it later on. Me, my bro with his gf and my darling just celebrated our mothr's b day. Bought my mum a diamond earing and pandant. Bought myself a a cute jacket ANd I am getting broke liao. hehe. but I just cant shopping. Christmas is coming. I love it. cause I like surprises and present from my love ones. hehe.

Sign off with love

Wow! Didn't know I'm a natural seducer. Maybe like what the descript says "I never realise it". I admit I'm like a big baby. I love it when my guy hug me tight and tell me "its alright.. I love you." I just need people tp spell out that they care inorder for me to feel it. maybe due to the reason that I believe action can be decieving but I know it too words are cheap. What to do I'm abit "fan jian" like to hear sweet nothing. That's just so GRACE. (haha)

I just can't stop thinking about my school life, where everyone is fun and harmless. Now I am stepping into the working life, where I have to climb my way up to get to a good place and good money. People say I am emotional, I can't agree to it more. I am an emotional creature. That's what I am and I am proud of it. At least I don't hide my true feeling about others. When I'm angry everyone knows it, when I'm happy everyone feels it. I was never extreme popular cause I don't really like to talk to others whom I don't know. I am selective about the friends I have around me. I never leave a deep impression in people's mind because I don't have something extremely wonderful neither a pretty face. I do my job in an average results, so here I am neither here or there. When It comes to studies I'm average too.

A lot of times people tends to forget how I feel, maybe people just don't care or they have the wrong perception of me. I used to put up a strong side of me to people whom I don't know and thus a lot of time people think I'm independent. Which I'm not.
I yearn for care, attention and consideration of my feelings.

Since years back people would say things that hurt my feeling but I just say "its ok" when I know it inside me that its not. I was once label as a flirt (an ugly flirt) but don't they understand that I really want to find true love so I just try and try. Now I have one but who knows what might happen in the end.

I have to thanks 2 friends who really hold me up and walk through my life for coming to 8 years. I know I'm being mushy but I just love my bestie.

There is this company which I worked with really show me what's the real corporate world is like. People who are scheming and backstabbing. Where effort don't pay but numbers do. I have to admit I learn a lot from there but I just cant help feeling sad for some who can act as if they love you when they truly hates you to core inside. All they are after is money. Sad case... I only realize what type of environment I am in after I left. I used to think that the top management was nice people but I realize I was so naive. I am inexperience. I used to tell me friends ... How good the company is and so on blah blah blah. Now I only have to laugh at myself. The reason I left or rather fired was because I was not mature enough and not because of my results. I was like "what the fuck!" What kind of fucking eason is that. But be it. I hope they wun bother about me anymore. But after I left for about 3 months they come emailing me that they count my commission wrongly. I was like "what the fuck again" and they want to take it back. After 3 months time. Can you imagine? So there I email back saying how can I believe them when all they offer me is a calculation in EXCEL (mind you excel can be done so easily). AND they said I'm being childish. Fine be it anyway it happen for such a long time ago. But I still can't get over it. Cause till today they still didn't manage to prepare my last payslip inorder for me to return the money. See how "fast" it can be.

I just can't feel the type of un-organization in the company when I was there. But now I realize that there's a lot of things to take note of when I am working and not just solely on the results. I have to wear shield like a turtle to protect my back.

I think enough of my whining. Since its all the past but I just can't forget as its a lesson for me to learn.

sign off with emptiness