I hate myself!!!!!! I told myself I will be happy when you patch with her. But I still cry, I still feel hurt. I hate myself to be so soft to you. I really want to breakfree~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why do I have to act like I am ok when I'm not. Why do I have to tell you its ok when I'm not. Why I nv stand for myself. Why I hurt myself!!!!! Why I am so silly when I face you. Why I lost myself when I am with you.

Can someone tell me why. I can wait for years just to be with him. Why I cant get him out of my fucking head!!!!! I hate the shit out of myself. I hate MYSELF!!!!!


I am blasting the music in my room I want to drown myself out. I dun feel like meeting anyone. I dun need anyone. I dun need ,.any guy to take care of me. I can survive by myself.

I will pass this fucking phase myself. I have to stand from where I fell. I can only blame myself for playing with fire when I know its fucking hurt.

I hate myself. Its retribution.

My friend keep asking me what happen. I was nv like that. I used to take things very easy. they said I use to say often "easy come, easy go". This is the 1st time they are seeing me crying for days over some guy. I really dunno what happen to me cause I nv felt this way before.

I am tearing but you will nv see it.