was drank a few night. feeling really bad. Think my gastric is acting up again keep having gastric pain. Argh I totally hate it.

Lost the one I really love issnt very good. Wish to have him by myself but I know its impossible now.

Still remember clear you told me "사랑해요" it means means I love you　代表着我　离不开你.

But you still left me. I always tell myself human's words cannt be trusted but still I trusted what you said and left me in pieces to pick up by myself again. This is the 2nd time and I hope it will be my last.

I am still learning to walk away what was left behind. I hope one day I will. If I ever miss call you again means I miss ya.

I will try not to. I will try to be strong and wun cry anymore. I know you feel bad when ever U hear someone cry.

Sorry that I called you last few days and cry.

Did something which i am not suppose to on friday night. feel bad about it. I know I am hurting myself. I know I shouldn;t have done what I did that day. Like what Dal told me, I am always at the disadventage. All I want is to numb myself from the pain I am feeling.

When I get drunk things seems to be worse I will show my true feelings and I keep crying none stop. I cant help it to call you and I want to listen to ur voice. I felt so silly that I feel that way.

Anyway I am such a disappointment to people who truly care about me.